Full disclosure: The week of Thanksgiving, I wrote this whole newsletter about how, for me, thankfulness is inextricably linked to mindfulness, and I went on about awareness and gratefulness and lots of other topics that would make Eckhart Tolle very proud. I was going to send it out as my usual Friday newsletter but then I ate too much and took too many naps because Thanksgiving, and my mother in law was there to help out with our daughter, and it’s so rare that we have extra hands, and I never got the newsletter into a place in which I felt comfortable sharing it, and here we are. I guess it was my way of trying to counter-balance all the consumerism in which I was partaking. So the irony is that this newsletter is ALL ABOUT CONSUMPTION. Of things, mostly. One day I’ll share that newsletter about mindfulness and all, but BALANCE, AMIRIGHT?
Back in my ye olde blogger days, I used to love making gift guides. I’d post up at my husband’s giant Mac monitor and employ my shoddy InDesign skills to whip up some sort of collage. There would be categories (for the Foodies!) and prices (this one’s a steal!) and I don’t know why, but I just loved talking about stuff. These days, I care much less about stuff in general, but I still feel very passionately about the things I do have and have brought me a particular kind of joy or serve a great utility: That pair of sweatpants that’s so well-made that they’ve withstood a million washes and don’t even still smell like breastmilk stains and chocolate; the hair towel I love so much I’m embarrassed to tell you it’s just a hair towel; the gift subscription box that I’m secretly considering sending to myself. So I culled some stuff that’s improving my quality of life for one reason or another. Sometimes it’s a simple as a little jolt of joy each time I use it/wear it. Maybe you—or your gift list—will benefit, too?
Let’s start with those sweatpants, eh? I got turned onto Richer Poorer at the height of the pandemic, while living in L.A., after finding out I was pregnant. Elastic waistbands were, needless to say, essential. But I didn’t want to feel—or look—like a schlub. I wasn’t looking for joggers. But I also didn’t want truck stop sweats. I wanted “nice” sweatpants. (Is it still an oxymoron if it’s true?) When I tell you that I have worn my Richer Poorer sweatpants nearly every day (save the hottest summer months) for the last two years, I am not exaggerating, even though that is something I do. They have not pilled or ripped or stretched out too much (just enough), and I have washed them more times than is legally advisable. For me, the $76 price tag is totally worth it for longevity’s sake.
BOX FOX
I am a bad gift giver. As in, the psychology behind my strategy is ridiculous. Say, for example, one of my best friends has a birthday coming up. A 40th birthday. (This is a real-life example, by the way.) I become so fixated on finding the most perfect gift, perfectly delivered, in the most perfect way (which is funny, because I’m not a perfectionist), that unless I actually find this perfect gift, I end up giving my friend nothing. (!) I know. I’m the worst. Then, I will spend years (years!) feeling guilty that I didn’t get my best friends anything for their 40th birthdays. (When I said this was a real-life example, I meant that I’ve done this to approximately every one of my dearest friends who has celebrated a 40th birthday in the last four years.)
Then my friend, Courtney, of sound mind and also-bougie taste, told me about Box Fox. It’s a gift box delivery service, but with high-end gifts you and your friends will actually like. Gifts that are both beautiful and functional. They’ve got everything from Brightland olive oil (one of my favorites) to Bala bangles. When you build a box, they merchandise products by color, so you can curate a color aesthetic, which I love. My closest friends are littered across the country and overseas, so in-person gift giving isn’t usually an option. Also, sometimes you just want to send a gal a gift to lift her spirits. Due to my already-absurd inability to buy time-sensitive gifts, I can’t handle another hurdle like scouring the whole Internet. Now I’ll just get them a Box Fox.
CROWN AFFAIR HAIR TOWEL
There’s not a lot to say about a hair towel except that this one is awesome. What’s so special about a freakin’ hair towel, you ask. Well, after you fling your whole mess of hair upside down and wrap it into the shape of a cruller donut, you can tuck the end of the towel securely into an elastic band. So it’s like a turban. But for drying your hair. And because it’s microfiber, it’s gentler on your strands than regular towels. (Fun fact: Box Fox offers this hair towel as part of their selection.)
I am a sucker for beauty rituals. (I feel a future essay coming on.) Dry skin brushes, coffee scrubs, face creams, serums, toners, masks, the works. I want it all. Do they really “work”? It’s hard to tell. But my Wildling gua sha never fails me. Originating in Chinese medicine, the practice of gua sha is meant to clear lymphatic pathways, removing stuck energy and built-up fluid. It’s not meant to be a quick fix; it’s a practice that ought to be done consistently and over time. It’s basically a low-key face massage. (I clench my jaw at night and love using my gua sha stone to relax the muscles in my jaw.) I have also found this routine to do wonders on puffiness the morning after a long night or a day of travel. I love the Wildling stone in particular for it’s multi-edged silhouette, and that they offer tons of resources for correctly practicing gua sha.
VIRTUE HAIR CARE
Spoiler Alert: I work here. You could argue that I’m biased, but you should also see how healthy my hair is. I started working with Virtue in January 2019. I’d been living in upstate New York for a year and it had taken me months to figure out why, in a few months, my hair had turned to shit. My blonde had turned yellow and brassy. The ends were fried and my once-lustrous locks were dull and breaking by the day. Turned out, it was the well water. Copper deposits and minerals from a poorly filtered system were ruining my color and drying out my hair. We put an additional filter on the shower head, but it wasn’t until I started using Virtue that my hair truly transformed.
I won’t go into full copywriter mode here (you can see that on the website), but I will tell you that what makes Virtue truly unique is that the main ingredient in every product is a keratin protein called Alpha Keratin 60ku®. It’s extracted from ethically sourced human hair and was discovered by a retired US Army Colonel. He was working in regenerative medicine, using this protein to heal the wounded skin of battlefield soldiers when they discovered that it could heal hair. As in—your hair used to be damaged, but after using Virtue, it is not. Because the keratin is derived from human hair, our hair welcomes it as its own, allowing it to weave broken keratin strands back together. When we repair damage on the stand, that means our hair is thicker, stronger, shinier, and more resilient. I could go on about this all day. (We also have incredible clinical data, which not every hair care brand can say). But I’ll wrap it up by saying: Virtue makes your hair more awesome. If you have questions about which products are right for your hair type, hit me up! I genuinely enjoy helping people get great hair.
GETTING THERE: A BOOK OF MENTORS by GILLIAN ZOE SEGAL
I love origin stories. There’s something about hearing where people came from and how they ended up where they are—and why—that is so satisfying and inspiring to me. For that reason, I recommend Getting There to everyone who’s ever had a dream. College grads, young professionals, artists, entrepreneurs, pretty much all adult humans. It includes stories from the likes of Warren Buffet, Marina Abramovic, Sara Blakely, Jeff Koons, and John Paul De Joria (of Paul Mitchell Systems and Patron—did you know he lost a bunch of jobs in the ‘70s because he was a hippie who got fired for going to Love-Ins and then lived in his car?! Yeah, so stories like that.) There’s the plight of the painfully handsome Anderson Cooper, who—can you believe this—had a hard time getting a job as an on-screen anchor. People were like, “No one wants to see your face on camera, Andy!” HA! And he basically took his Vanderbilt money and flew around the world to record himself in war zones to prove he that he could. My only critique is that there is a gross lack of people of color (and way more men than women—we get it, we live in a patriarchal society!), but here’s hoping for a Volume 2.
PRIMAL WINE SUBSCRIPTION
I will spare you the boring details, but due to a potential allergic reaction to pesticides, I almost always only drink natural, biodynamic, or organic wines. Each classification varies somewhat from the next (I found this article enlightening), but basically, each of them are grown without pesticides and have little to no additives. I discovered this nearly 10 years ago, when natural wine bars and shops weren’t particularly popular, so when I was out at a party or to dinner, I did my best with what was available. Mostly whiskey. But once I started looking into traditional and natural wines, I got a little skeeved out.
Legally companies are allowed by the FDA to include up to 76 different additives in wine, including metals, toxic chemicals, sugars, yeasts, additional sulfites, and even fish bladders(?!)? Thankfully, natural/biodynamic/organic wines are much easier to find these days. If you have a local place, see if they offer any kind of club or subscription to support local. In L.A., we were frequent visitors of Highland Park Wine & Silverlake Wine. I haven’t found as many options here in the Triangle, so I am a Wine Club member with Primal Wines. Three wines a month for $90 is worth the peace of mind that I can have my wine and drink it, too—without getting a headache and a scratchy throat and stuffy nose and also sneezing. (It’s a strange reaction.)
AYR BUTTON-DOWN
I love this shirt so much I wrote a whole newsletter about it. But I’d say judging by the 1,135 five-star reviews that it’s a cult favorite.
NESPRESSO AEROCCINO3 MILK FROTHER
I first used this magical device at my friend Julie’s house. Julie is one of my best longtime friends, and before we lived in L.A., we’d go stay with her and her family for long stints of time. She is a recipe developer and cookbook author, and happens to also be a consummate host. Even when her children were young and her life was as chaotic as all new mothers’ lives tend to be, she’d still be sure to stock her kitchen and fill our bellies with everything from warming, homemade meals to the best local takeout. Each morning, we’d pad out of the guest room into her light-filled home and, in our dreary states, pop in a Nespresso pod and take advantage of this frothy gadget. When my husband and I would finally leave the comforts of her hospitality—a world without freshly steamed whole milk and local avocados smeared on delicately toasted slices of newly baked sourdough bread, we found the real world much too harsh to survive. We immediately bought ourselves a frother and I am all the better for it. Though it has ruined me for coffee in other people’s homes. (Except at my brother’s house because after using mine, he got one, too.) But it brings me a great deal of joy—and a little slice of my dear Julie—each morning.
These days, you can get a great set of linen sheets nearly anywhere, so by all means, save yourself some money if you can. But my experience is mostly with the sheets from Hawkins NY ($$$), so I can only speak to that. Back before I had a child and wanted to blow unnecessary amounts of money on things like nice linen sheets, I invested in these from Hawkins. I’ve had them for about three years now and they have held up beautifully (both color and quality). It’s a simple thing, but each time I look at my bed, I feel joy. Every night when I slip beneath the sheets, they make me happy.
HATCH SOUND MACHINE (FOR ADULTS)
I wasn’t ready to move my daughter to her own room at 4 1/2 half months. But not for the reasons you think. I’d assumed she’d be in our room until she was six months old. But she’d already busted out of her swaddle into a Magic Merlin (bless), and she’d begun rolling over and getting stuck in the corner of her bassinet. She’d wake up screaming in anger, and within one night, we’d moved her into her own room and into her crib. But it was the deafening absence of her Hatch sound machine that kept us up that night. It had been the most perfect tenor of white noise—a drowning sea of velvet ambiance. Controllable from an app on our phones. Easy to turn on and off with or without lights. Soon after, my husband bought me the Restore and I never looked back. Now, night after night, the whole family falls asleep to dulcet tones of collective SHHHHHHHHHH.
Over this! More of these please! Heading over to check out Fox Box now :)
Love this list - I’ve never heard of Wilding Gua Sha but now it’s going on my Wish List!! (Definitely looking forward to an essay on beauty rituals!)